Friday 26 February 2021

I did get some work done on the vest.  And I ended up ordering the extra skein of plum Regal as well as the Fundy Fog that I want for the edgings up top.  


I made the decision with science.  My scale has  been kicking around here for a while, in my way, and I got it in my head to weigh the skein, knit a couple of rows till I had an inch, and weigh the skein again.  Then math helped me sort out exactly how long the vest will be if I don't add stitches.  I wanted a bit more length,  so I put the order in and will have it just as I am finished with the skein and a bit I have.  There will be enough left that I will be a striped hat and mittens for someone out there.

And then I didn't do anything.  Nothing.  For the rest of the day.  Nothing.  That rarely happens and I can only put it down to covid weariness.  I have been struggling with that for the last month or so.  I am certain that much of it is combined with the usual February blahs and the lack of sunlight the last few months, but it us also connected to getting out in the world in a small way. 

I have been visiting people the last few weeks via zoom and have been talking with my kids lots and I thought that would help.  The opposite has happened because suddenly, I am out in the world and all my insecurities rear their ugly heads.  When it is just me, they lay there quiet, unchallenged and almost hidden.  Going out into the world means facing not just people but all those little things it is so much easier to hide from.  It does add a certain stress to the pleasure of visiting and that bit of added stress is the straw that broke this camels back.

Hiding is not healthy and is not the answer to this.  But spacing out the visits is a way to deal with the stress so that is what I will do.  

Starting the day with a way to cope makes everything better.  I can knit again.

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